Keep those lines of communication with your kids open- even when it's tough!
@nautilusbehavioral
Sarah here. Right now, there’s a lot that’s in flux. It’s been a couple of weeks since the election. Thanksgiving is around the corner. Flu season is underway. And around the world, there are new COVID-19 related restrictions in place. Even concrete events feel less stable as there is an ongoing sense of uncertainty in 2020. Exactly when and how things will transpire feels more up in the air than usual. Many of us aren’t experiencing the sense of relief that we normally feel after major decisions are settled or stressful events have passed. This apprehension has left us with a fairly constant tension in our minds and bodies. So, what do we do about it? We need to follow the advice of that old expression “don’t hold your breath.” “Don’t hold your breath” means don’t count on something because it’s unlikely to happen or won’t happen for a very long time. The idea behind this phrase is that it will take longer for the event to transpire than you could possibly hold your breath. You may or may not realize it, but people often hold their breath when they are anticipating something. That phrase “waiting with bated breath” may seem a bit melodramatic but it rings true for a reason. When we’re eagerly awaiting something, we hold our breath. People also hold their breath when they’re stressed, anxious, excited, upset, frustrated…there are a lot of times when we inadvertently hold our breath without even realizing it. So, why does holding your breath matter? When we’re relaxed, our muscles are working while we inhale, but are relaxed as we exhale. When we are physically and emotionally tense, both inhaling and exhaling are restricted due to muscle contraction. This means breathing is more labor intensive and less productive- it feels “harder to breathe” and leads us to feel like we aren’t getting enough oxygen, which is just downright uncomfortable. Tension also shortens or eliminates the natural “expiratory pause” (i.e., the cessation in movement of our breathing muscles) we experience after exhaling. Without this pause, we may feel an increased sense of threat. Let’s get back to 2020. A lot of things that we normally take for granted haven’t gone as planned, including major stuff like our kids being able to go to school or us being able to go to work. At the same time, there’s a continued sense of uncertainty as we face unprecedented situations left and right and we haven’t necessarily experienced the relief we’d normally experience after stress has passed. So…now does it make sense why I said not to hold your breath? It wasn’t eye-rolling sarcasm. I wasn’t being snarky or a smart aleck about 2020. It was me looking out for you.Your body’s natural response to this year of uncertainty may very well be to hold your breath and that response could be making you feel worse. You may be wondering what prompted this post. This morning, I felt a strong sense of pressure in my body before realizing that I had been holding my breath while thinking about the coming weeks. So, trust me when I say we are in this together. What can you do if your natural response to anticipation and/or stress is to hold your breath?
Increase your awareness of your inner experience. Be mindful not just of the thoughts or emotions you’re experiencing when stressed but also pay attention to your physical sensations. Sometimes, resolving those somatic symptoms can quickly and painlessly resolve our distress. So, breathe and stretch out your tense muscles. Breathing may not decrease your uncertainty about the future, but it may help you feel more in-control physically. And feeling a little more in control of your body may be just the boost you need to take charge mentally. Click here for a printable version of this post.
When do you find you're holding your breath? Does stress, frustration, anxiety, excitement or something else leave you waiting to exhale? Leave a comment below, click this link or email us at [email protected].
10 Comments
Angela Smith
12/3/2021 09:31:06 am
This was very helpful and informative.
Reply
Melinda hackney
5/6/2022 11:55:59 am
I have been doing this for my whole life and I am 57. I am always stressed. I have actual caused myself to have neck problems because of it. This article has helped some. Im gonna try to be aware of my breathy and if I find my self not breathing I will stop and breathe.
Reply
Howard Truitt Jr.
2/28/2022 06:14:17 pm
This exactly what i just realized. I've been holding my breath at times and it would bring on anxiety. So thank you so much.
Reply
Pau Dixon
3/10/2022 03:00:21 am
This has been so helpful for me. I have been bothered with this for a while now. Even doing this now as my mind races in between typing.
Reply
Dylan Tomlinson
4/6/2022 11:44:05 am
I knew I wasn't going crazy. Lol.
Reply
Bilikis
4/14/2022 03:36:39 pm
This was extremely insightful. Thanks for sharing.
Reply
Alex
8/17/2022 04:34:29 am
OCD is causing me to hold my breath frequently and to feel tensed up. Which causes me to feel stressed all the time.
Reply
Eucharia Ekwekei was
9/18/2022 12:06:55 pm
I am happy to see this, I always hold my breath each time am expecting something making to start having anxiety
Reply
Mike Weatherbee
3/20/2023 07:49:22 am
I am 52 and I had 2 strokes back in 2019 and 2020 and I do this more times than I even know, my wife back when we met used to tell me that I breath funny. some times I will stop suddenly and I do not do this, also after the strokes I was being evaluated for some minor speech issues and even they noticed when I am doing a task like problem solving I also stopped breathing for short periods of time and many times during the assignment. I have ended up having to take 1 or 2 deep breaths afterwards but has never caused me any harm, the doctors at one time though it could have caused my migraines, until I had a good size hole surgically plugged and I stopped having migraines after almost 45 years. Knowing why and what causes this would be great to know
Reply
Margaret
5/22/2023 11:26:20 am
Im 70 done this all my life but did know why. I think its stress for me. And my sister has it also. Thank u for putting this out.
Reply
Your comment will be posted after it is approved.
Leave a Reply. |
Welcome!Feel free to peruse our blog and see what Sarah and Lisa had to say about topics related to your needs as a busy parent. We will talk about everything from parenting values, to life hacks, to realistic self-care. Archives
August 2023
|
Conveniently located in Mandarin
Serving Duval, St. Johns and the surrounding counties |
|
Address12412 San Jose Blvd.
Suite 203 Jacksonville, FL 32223 |
Telephone904-432-3321
|
|