Keep those lines of communication with your kids open- even when it's tough!
Sarah here. We hope that you found last week’s blog on managing parent guilt helpful. Whether your kids are triggering your parent guilt or you are, it’s quite possible that your sense of guilt ties into your sense of success as a parent. So today, we’re talking about how you define success as a parent.
Oxford Languages defines success in part as “the accomplishment of an aim or purpose.” Sounds straightforward, right? Maybe not. If we’re talking about success as a parent, do you consider whether you accomplished a specific goal? Or do you evaluate whether you’re accomplishing your general purpose as a parent? But then that begs the question…what’s your general purpose as a parent?
Overall, most parents want their children to grow up feeling loved. Most parents hope to raise kids who become independent and (you guessed it) successful. But rather than focusing on how we define success or general ways other people talk about success, we wanted you to reflect on your own personal metric of success as a parent.
Read through the questions that follow and notice what comes to mind. There aren’t “right” or “wrong” answers here. You don’t need to “think hard” about the questions- these are things that you’ll likely have immediate thoughts about, so just notice the first thoughts that show up. If you’d like, you can jot down your answers, but no pressure.
Think about whether the ways you currently define success as a parent are the only metrics that matter. Maybe you’re so focused on your family feeling loved that you haven’t really focused on how you feel. Maybe you’ve been so invested in your children being “well-behaved” that you haven’t really considered how they feel. It may also be helpful to consider whether your metrics of success actually matter to you. Sometimes, we’re so focused on what things look like from the outside (e.g., how our children behave), we don’t consider what they feel like on the inside (e.g., you feel stressed and upset with your children all the time, you’re constantly focusing on correcting their behavior).
Feel free to peruse our blog and see what Sarah and Lisa had to say about topics related to your needs as a busy parent. We will talk about everything from parenting values, to life hacks, to realistic self-care.